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  • Child 1: Please, don't ground us!
  • Me: Stop groveling as if this is the worst day of your life. This is a good day. I'm going to give you all the opportunity to rehabilitate yourselves, and become productive members of this family.
  • Right now, you're lost. But pledge your loyalty to me, and I'll give you a new purpose in your lives. Of course if you don't want to cooperate you can stay right here. Hopefully someone saves you before Mom finds this mess. But I wouldn't count on it.
  • Child 1: No, we'll play nice! Don't leave us here!
  • Child 2: We pledge our loyalty to you, Great Dad.
Source: serpentguard
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benpaddon:

ayethatgirlrithany:

sexysalomonandthecurtainchild:

This is exactly how physics does not work.

Why didn’t she just use the lipstick on the door? 

(via blackandboring)

Source: ForGIFs.com
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wickedclothes:

Yellow Submarine Tea Infuser

This Yellow Submarine should be filled with loose tea or herbs, not Beatles (or beetles for that matter). Simply fill your cup or teapot with boiling water and immerse the submarine. Currently on sale at Amazon.

(via blackandboring)

Source: wickedclothes
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chelseajadexo:

have you ever had a weird sort of crush on one of your friends where you cant actually tell if its a crush or not??? do i want to kiss you?? do i just really enjoy being your friend????? who knows? not me

(via blackandboring)

Source: chelseajadexo
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stephariffic:

nitwitteryinc:

verbose-vespertine:

cubebreaker:

Designer Goula Figeura’s Orwell day bed lets you easily shut yourself off from the outside world with its light and noise-cancelling curtains.

I have a MIGHTY NEED.

*grabby hands*

Must. Has.

(via seoppiesaur)

Source: cubebreaker
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i-dontknow-ok:

stunningpicture:

You can plug in anywhere on the square

God is that you

(via blackandboring)

Source: stunningpicture
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bucky-oh-bucky:

whatsbetterthanfantasy:

last-snowfall:

Yeah cats TOTALLY only like us for food and have no emotional dependency at all.

THIS IS SO CUTE I CANT

it’s like, human, excuse me, i would like you to pet me. thank you.

(via blackandboring)

Source: oddhour